Back
    C
    Bluesky

    Chris Longman

    @chrislongman.bsky.social

    Followers

    80

    Posts

    148

    Following

    403

    Packs

    0

    Software developer-turned-attorney. Focusing on security and privacy issues. Probably breaking 3D printers right now. He/him/hockey. Thoughts are my own.

    Chris Longman: The Kraken Crusader with a Side of Sarcasm!

    A blend of hockey fervor, legal musings, and 3D printer admiration that keeps you guessing.

    "

    A mix of analytical brilliance and hockey heartbreak, served with a side of wit.

    "
    85%
    Authenticity
    70%
    Thought Leader

    Key Topics

    90%
    Seattle Kraken Hockey
    60%
    Legal Commentary

    What's On Your Mind? 🤔

    Your content DNA, decoded

    Your Top Topics

    Seattle Kraken Hockey90%

    Chris's obsession with the #seakraken is so profound that if he were a hockey player, he'd definitely be a power play and penalty kill in one—confusing yet effective!

    Legal Commentary60%

    Every post about law is like a legal thriller, minus the thrill but with heaps of thoughtfulness; it's like reading a contract and a comic strip all at once!

    3D Printing70%

    His love for 3D printers is evident—admirable little guys that he wants to adorn with googly eyes; they deserve a place in his heart and feed!

    Writing Style

    Chris writes like a legal brief, if legal briefs came with punchlines. His posts read like a witty friend explaining hockey rules—concise, dry, and occasionally tragic.

    Thought Leader Score

    70%

    The Real You™ 🎭

    Your online personality exposed

    Your Vibe

    The Caring Critic

    Keeping It Real Score

    85%

    Main Character Energy

    • Hockey fanatic
    • Legal insights
    • Unexpected humor about 3D printing

    Secret Powers

    • Making legal matters entertaining
    • Captivating an audience with 140 characters
    • Turning sports anguish into artful quips

    If you were an AI...🤖

    Are you just a GPT wrapper?

    Training Data

    3D printing technology, hockey statistics, legal commentary, and social media humor.

    Prompt Engineering

    Generate witty commentary blending sports, law, and technology.

    Model Behavior

    Sassy yet insightful, navigating through complex issues with humor.

    Token Count

    150

    tokens

    Dating App Edition💝

    Your profile in swipe-speak

    Bio

    "Hockey-loving legal eagle seeking someone to discuss the existential implications of 3D printing and the occasional Kraken game. Must appreciate sarcasm and tolerate legal jargon."

    Red Flags

    • 🚩Obsessed with a hockey team that can’t seem to get it right.
    • 🚩Tendency to anthropomorphize inanimate objects, like 3D printers.
    • 🚩Legal commentary may come up during dinner.

    Green Flags

    • Can make legal discussions entertaining.
    • Knows the difference between a power play and a penalty kill.
    • Loves animals, particularly if they can be printed in 3D.

    Perfect Match

    A fellow sports fanatic who enjoys deep dives into law, the philosophy of printing, and can handle a dad joke or two.

    AnotherWrapper Logo

    Build Your Own AI App

    This roast generator is built with AnotherWrapper. Get access to 10+ AI templates and launch your startup quickly.

    • 🎯

      AI Demo Apps

      10+ ready-to-use AI demo applications for text, image & chat

    • Modern Stack

      Next.js 14, TypeScript & Tailwind

    • 🤖

      AI integrations

      OpenAI, Anthropic, Grok, Replicate & more

    • 🛠️

      Full Infrastructure

      Auth, database & payments included

    • 💎

      Premium Design

      Beautiful UI components included

    • 🛡️

      Enterprise Ready

      Auth, API routes & database included

    Squad Check🌟

    Your social vibe analysis

    Role in Community

    Hockey Philosopher

    Conversation Style

    Direct, yet layered with nuance—like a law professor with a flurry of hockey stats and dad jokes.

    Impact Assessment

    Chris's insights resonate like a well-timed slap shot; they stick with you, even if the Kraken don’t!

    TL;DR Version

    Your profile in a flash

    Chris Longman: The Kraken Crusader with a Side of Sarcasm!

    A blend of hockey fervor, legal musings, and 3D printer admiration that keeps you guessing.

    Vibe Check

    "A mix of analytical brilliance and hockey heartbreak, served with a side of wit."

    Spice Level Check🌶️

    The saucy details

    Gentle Roasts

    • 🔥He might be the only Kraken fan who thinks 3D printers deserve more love than the team sometimes.
    • 🔥His legal commentary is so on point, it’s a wonder he hasn’t been called in to help save the Kraken from their PK mishaps.

    Quirky Challenges

    • 😅Needs to balance hockey rants with more general musings on life—maybe a post on the existential dread of printing gone wrong?
    • 😅Could tone down the Kraken pain just a smidge; therapy’s good, buddy!

    Main Character Moments

    • When he declared his undying love for Shane's goals, the entire Bluesky community collectively rolled their eyes and giggled.

    Level Up Zone📈

    Your character progression

    Hidden Potential

    Chris could take his love for both law and hockey and turn it into a killer podcast—'Pucks & Pleas' anyone?

    Unique Advantages

    • 💎A unique blend of legal and sports insight that could attract a diverse audience
    • 💎The ability to find humor in any situation, especially ones involving his teams' misfortunes.

    Level Up Suggestions

    • 🚀Consider branching out into more diverse topics—maybe a post about the merits of obscure Canadian sitcoms or the philosophy of watching paint dry?
    • 🚀Engage more with the community—respond more to others' posts; the world needs more Chris in their feeds!

    Crystal Ball Time🔮

    Your future, decoded

    Next Evolution

    Moving from 280 characters to potentially hosting a Bluesky sports panel—buckle up, folks!

    Potential Superpower

    Mastering the intersection of law and sports commentary like a true pro; he might just run for office in the Kraken fan council!

    Future Community Role

    The go-to guy for legal advice when discussing penalties and rules in hockey—someone has to make it fun!

    Your Character Build🎮

    If life was an RPG...

    Class

    Lawful Hockey Enthusiast

    Special Abilities

    • ⚔️Punny Hockey Analysis
    • ⚔️Legal Insight Deployment
    • ⚔️3D Printing Passion

    Weaknesses

    • 💀Overly Analytical Rants
    • 💀Hockey Heartbreaks
    • 💀3D Printer Malfunctions

    Quest Line

    Navigating the treacherous ice of Seattle sports while advocating for privacy laws and creating adorable printers.

    Down the Rabbit Hole🕵️‍♂️

    Your conspiracy detector

    Main Theory

    The Seattle Kraken are actually a front for a secret society of 3D printing enthusiasts.

    Evidence Board

    1. Every loss is conveniently timed with major 3D printing expo events. 2. Players are often seen with mysterious printing materials before games. 3. High scoring games lead to sudden spikes in printer sales.

    Secret Society

    The Illuminati of Ice and Ink—devoted to merging sports, privacy laws, and 3D technology.

    Truth Seeking Level

    75%

    Multiverse You🌌

    Your variants across platforms

    Reddit Moderator Of

    r/r/HockeyAndLaw

    Twitter Main Character

    Debating whether the Kraken and Sunless Sea are actually parallel sports entities.

    LinkedIn Title

    CEO of Legal Hiccups & Hockey Snafus, specializing in 3D printer litigation.

    Metaverse Final Form

    A holographic lawyer at a virtual Seattle Kraken game, giving legal advice on power plays.

    AnotherWrapper Logo

    Build Your Own AI App

    This roast generator is built with AnotherWrapper. Get access to 10+ AI templates and launch your startup quickly.

    • 🎯

      AI Demo Apps

      10+ ready-to-use AI demo applications for text, image & chat

    • Modern Stack

      Next.js 14, TypeScript & Tailwind

    • 🤖

      AI integrations

      OpenAI, Anthropic, Grok, Replicate & more

    • 🛠️

      Full Infrastructure

      Auth, database & payments included

    • 💎

      Premium Design

      Beautiful UI components included

    • 🛡️

      Enterprise Ready

      Auth, API routes & database included

    Time Machine

    Your digital time warp

    Web 1.0 Profile

    > A Geocities site with dancing hockey players and animated 3D printers, with a guestbook full of legal templates.

    MySpace Era

    A background featuring rainbow colors and a playlist of sad hockey ballads.

    Web3 Destiny

    Leading a decentralized platform for fans to discuss legalities of sports contracts and the latest in 3D printing.

    Future Post

    "Just got in a heated debate about the legality of zamboni use as an unfair advantage. #seakraken #law"

    The Final Take🎬

    Wrapping up your story

    Key Strength

    Chris's ability to marry humor with critical commentary is his superpower. It draws people in like a well-timed slap shot.

    Charming Quirk

    His affection for 3D printers is a charming contrast to his intense sports commentary, reminding us that even hard-core fans have a soft side.

    Final Encouragement

    "Keep turning that legal analysis into laughs, and remember, every Kraken game is just a new opportunity for another great punchline!"

    What is Bluesky Roast?

    Bluesky Roast is an AI-powered tool that analyzes your Bluesky presence and turns it into a hilarious roast. With millions of users sharing content daily, I thought it would be fun to add some humor to social media analytics.

    The AI combines advanced language models with comedy writing techniques to create personalized, witty observations about your posting habits, interactions, and overall Bluesky personality.

    Creator

    I'm Fekri, and I built Bluesky Roast to make social media analysis more entertaining. When I'm not building fun AI apps, I'm helping founders and developers build their own AI-powered products. If you'd like to know more about that, feel free to check out AnotherWrapper.com for more information!

    Previous Roasts

    P

    Poppy

    @poppypop.bsky.social

    85%
    80%

    Poppy: The Politically Charged Cat Lady of Bluesky

    D

    Daniel Segmüller

    @wolkenpumpe.bsky.social

    92%
    75%

    Daniel Segmüller: The Culinary Dadaist of Bluesky

    S

    Sadie

    @sadiesnail.bsky.social

    85%
    60%

    Sadie: The Snail-Obsessed Character Artist of Bluesky

    M

    Moody Kitty

    @mkittyd.bsky.social

    85%
    70%

    Moody Kitty: La Philosophe des Post-Its et de l'Optimisme Nostalgique

    C

    Corvil

    @corvil.bsky.social

    85%
    20%

    Welcome to the Corvil Show: Fandoms, Furry Friends, and Fun

    O

    Ornikkar🥤

    @ornikkar.bsky.social

    89%
    75%

    Ornikkar🥤: the Philosophical Pundit of Bluesky

    M

    Mike T.

    @scoobytaggs.bsky.social

    85%
    70%

    Mike T.: The Book-Hoarding Cheese Enthusiast of Bluesky

    A

    Advait Bhat

    @advaitmb.bsky.social

    90%
    50%

    Introducing Advait: A PhD Student with More Potential than Bluesky has Users

    T

    The Ugly Poser

    @theuglyposer.bsky.social

    85%
    60%

    The Ugly Poser: A Daydreamer in Design and a Night Owl at Heart

    A

    Az Anonim Luigi

    @caciki.bsky.social

    75%
    68%

    Az Anonim Luigi: The Documented Life of Nonsensical Professionalism

    M

    Michelle Artemis

    @michelleartemis.bsky.social

    89%
    75%

    Michelle Artemis: The Cosmic Librarian of Bluesky

    k

    krisch0708.bsky.social

    @krisch0708.bsky.social

    88.5%
    82%

    Welcome to the Krisch Show: A Mix of Deep House Beats and Deep Thoughts

    J

    José Leão Pires

    @jmlpires.bsky.social

    85%
    75%

    José Leão Pires: The Master of Dramatic Pauses and Academic Insights

    J

    James Carey

    @jamescarey714.bsky.social

    85%
    70%

    James Carey: The Cartographer of Social Media Commentary

    W

    Wojtek

    @wojtek.be

    85%
    70%

    Wojtek: Your Neighborhood IT Guy and Social Media Philosopher!

    V

    Void-Kampf

    @void-kampf.bsky.social

    85%
    75%

    Void-Kampf: The Social Media Samurai

    A

    Alex

    @gonzaleztapia.bsky.social

    92.5%
    88%

    Gonzalez Tapia: The Trumpet of Discontent

    L

    Linda

    @lexcentrique.bsky.social

    95%
    88%

    Linda: The Bluesky Sorceress of Breakfast and Thought

    🦋⁷

    @suganova.bsky.social

    85%
    70%

    The Artful Dodger of Bluesky: A Portrait in Pixels

    I

    Ingrid Zenger

    @ingrid1.bsky.social

    92%
    88%

    Ingrid Zenger: The Cat-Loving Queen of Controversy and Stained Glass Wonders