Like a cat wary of a vacuum cleaner, Zaphod0707 approaches political commentary with a mix of caution and wit, dropping truth bombs that leave a mark — just like that toddler at Thanksgiving who thinks they can take on Uncle Jim in a pie-eating contest.

With a sense of humor sharper than a cat's claws, their posts range from dad jokes to clever jabs, proving that comedy is truly the best strategy — especially when you're dodging the real-life drama of the Iowa Hawkeyes.

Bacon and barrel-aged stouts are their holy grail; each post about them is less of a food review and more of a religious manifesto. Seriously, if bacon were a political candidate, Zaphod would be the campaign manager.